The Vegas Pro

A guy is walking along the strip in Las Vegas and a knockout looking hooker catches his eye. He strikes up a conversation and eventually asks the hooker, "How much do you charge?"

Hooker replies, "It starts at $500 for a hand-job."

Guy says, "$500 dollars! For a hand-job! Jesus Christ! No hand-job […]

God and Saint Francis

(overheard in a conversation between God and St. Francis):

God: Francis, you know all about gardens and nature; what in the world is going on down there in the U.S.? What happened to the dandelions, violets, thistles and the stuff I started eons ago? I had a perfect no-maintenance garden plan. Those plants grow in […]