The Wedding Night

The wedding date was set and the groom’s three pals – a carpenter, an electrician and a dentist were deciding what pranks to play on the couple on their wedding night.

The carpenter figured sawing the slats of their bed would give them a chuckle or two.

The electrician decided to wire the bed – […]

A Very Successful Attorney

A very successful attorney parked his brand new Lexus in front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he was getting out, a truck came along too closely and completely tore off the driver’s door.

Fortunately, a cop in a police car was close enough to see the accident […]

God’s First Name

This guy dies and goes to heaven. When he gets there, St. Peter is standing at the gate. He says, "If you can answer these three questions I will let you in to heaven. First, how many seconds are in a year? Second, how many days of the week have a ‘T’ in them? Third, […]

The Shortest Essay

This is a story of a 16 year-old boy from Tamworth who won the World’s Shortest Essay competition.

He was awarded a scholarship at the University of Sydney for his imagination and humour…

Here it is…

Shortest Essay:

An English university creative writing class was asked to write a concise essay containing the following elements:

[…]

The Vegas Pro

A guy is walking along the strip in Las Vegas and a knockout looking hooker catches his eye. He strikes up a conversation and eventually asks the hooker, "How much do you charge?"

Hooker replies, "It starts at $500 for a hand-job."

Guy says, "$500 dollars! For a hand-job! Jesus Christ! No hand-job […]

The Earthquake in Pakistan

A big earthquake with the strength of 8.1 on the Richter Scale has hit Pakistan . Two million Pakistanis have died and over a million are injured. The country is totally ruined, and the government doesn’t know where to start, with providing help to rebuild. The rest of the world is in shock. The USA […]

Farting Loudly

This is a story about a couple who had been happily married for years. The only friction in their marriage was the husband’s habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke.

The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.

Every morning she […]

Weapons of Math Destruction

At New York’s Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a setsquare, a slide rule, and a calculator.

At a morning press conference, Attorney general John Ashcroft said he believes the man is a […]

Two Guys Wearing Hoodies

Saint Peter is sitting at the Pearly Gates when two guys wearing hoodies arrived. St. Peter looked out through the Gates and said "Wait here. I will be right back."

St. Peter goes over to God’s chambers and carefully describes the two men waiting for entrance.

God says to Peter: "How many times do I […]

God Creating Women

While creating women, God made a promise to men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world.

And then He smiled and made the earth round.