The “Kiwis Are Not Stupid” Convention

50,000 Kiwis meet in Eden Park for a "Kiwis Are Not Stupid" Convention.

Helen Clark says, "We are all here today to prove to the world thet Kiwis are not stupid. Ken I hev a volunteer."

Carlos Spencer gingerly works his way through the crowd and steps up to The stage.

Helen asks him, "What uz fufteen plus fufteen?"

After fufteen or twunty seconds Carlos says, "Eighteen!"

Obviously everyone is a little disappointed. Then all 50,000 Kiwis start chanting, "GUV HUM ANOTHER CHANCE! GUV HUM ANOTHER CHANCE!"

Helen says, "Well sunce we’ve gone to the trouble of gitting 50,000 of You un one place end we have the world wide priss end global broadcast media here, I thunk we ken guv hum another chance."

So she asks, "What uz sivven plus sivven?"

After nearly 30 seconds he eventually says, "Ninety!"

Helen is quite perplexed, looks down and just lets out a dejected sigh – everyone is disheartened.

Carlos starts crying and the 50,000 Kiwis begin to yell and wave their hands shouting, "GUV HUM ANOTHER CHANCE! GUV HUM ANOTHER CHANCE!"

Helen, unsure whether or not she is doing more harm than damage, Eventually says, "Ok! Ok! Just one more chance…What uz two plus two?"

Carlos closes his eyes, and after a whole minute eventually says, "Four!"

Throughout the stadium pandemonium breaks out as all 50,000 Kiwis jump To their feet, wave their arms, stamp their feet and scream…


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