The Monday Morning Mirth

Tag: WOW

  • Shipwrecked Lawyers

    The only thing on the island was a tall coconut tree that provided them their only food. Each day one of the lawyers would climb to the top to see if he could spot a rescue boat coming.

    One day the lawyer yelled down from the tree, "WOW, I just can’t believe my eyes. There is a woman out there floating in our direction." The lawyer on the ground was most skeptical and said, "You’re hallucinating, you’ve finally lost your mind."

    But within a few minutes, up to the beach floated a stunningly beautiful woman, face up, totally naked, unconscious, without even so much a ring or earrings on her person. The two lawyers went down to the water, dragged her up on the beach and discovered, yes, she was alive, warm and breathing.

    One said to the other, "You know, we’ve been on this God forsaken island for months now without a woman. It’s been such a long, long time….So .. Do you think we should… well… You know… Screw her?"

    "Out of what?" asked the other lawyer.

  • The Husband Superstore

    Recently, a "Husband Superstore" opened, where women could go to choose a husband from among many men. It was laid out in five floors, with the men increasing in positive attitudes as you ascended.

    The only rule was, once you opened the door to any floor, you HAD to choose a man from that floor; if you went up a floor, you couldn’t go back down except to leave the place, never to return.

    A couple of girlfriends went to the superstore to find some husbands……….

    First floor, the door had a sign saying, "These men have jobs and love kids." The women read the sign and said, "Well, that’s better than not having a job or not loving kids, but I wonder what’s further up?" So up they went.

    Second floor, the sign read, "These men have high paying jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking."
    "Hmmmm," said the ladies, "But I wonder what’s further up?"

    Third floor, the sign read, "These men have high paying jobs, are extremely good looking, love kids and help with the housework."
    "WOW," said the women. "Very tempting." But there was another floor, so further up they went.

    Fourth floor, this door had a sign saying, "These men have high paying jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework and have a strong romantic streak."
    "Oh, mercy me," they cried, "Just think what must be awaiting us further on!
    So up to the fifth floor they went.

    Fifth floor. The sign on that door said, "This floor is empty and exists only to prove that women are impossible to please. The exit is to your left, we hope you fall down the stairs !!"