A guy goes into confession and says to the priest, "Father, I’m 80 years old, widower, with 11 grandchildren. Last night I met two beautiful flight attendants. They took me home and I made love to both of them. Twice."
The priest said: "Well, my son, when was the last time you were in confession?"
"Never Father, I’m Jewish."
"So then, why are you telling me?"
"I’m telling everybody."
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